| We've all known disappointments – some deeply personal, others collective and even global. With 20/20 hindsight, we know that there's life after our disappointments, and even blessings. In the moment that life dashes our hopes and dreams, however, often we forget. This week's Torah portion offers profound lessons about recovery after life doesn't go our way, with a striking image to help us – a pregnant Moses. Yes, you read that correctly. Read on. |
Parashat Vaethanan 5785 (2025)
What do Jewish values ask of us amidst disappointment? It's an important question today, and every day.
The award for Torah's biggest disappointment goes to Moses: he didn't get to cross over into the Land of Promise. After 40 years leading our wayward desert ancestors to a land flowing with milk and honey, Moses wasn't allowed to finish the job. Talk about disappointment!
We've all known disappointments, maybe crushing ones. Some disappointments are deeply personal, others professional. Some touch us as individuals or families; others relate to our communities, country or planet.
Often 20/20 hindsight reminds us that life goes on after life doesn't go our way. We learn humility. We learn resilience. We learn to adapt. We learn that sometimes not getting what we want turns out to be a stroke of luck – or even a blessing in disguise. Sometimes we reorient our lives and are better for it.
Even so, when life dashes our expectations or hopes, often we can't see beyond it – at least, not at first. That, I imagine, was how Moses felt when he learned that he wouldn't enter the Land of Promise. But Moses' story is far, far more nuanced.
Moses learned that he wouldn't enter the Land after he acted angrily toward the people (Numbers 20:10-12). In response, Moses said... nothing. Torah says nothing about Moses' response – but how could Moses have no reaction to this profound disappointment? Surely something more was afoot.
Now in this week's Torah portion, we learn what happened next. Speaking to the people, Moses recounted (Deuteronomy 3:23-27):
| וָאֶתְחַנַּ֖ן אֶל־יהו׳׳ה בָּעֵ֥ת הַהִ֖וא לֵאמֹֽר׃ אֲדֹנָ֣י יהו''ה אַתָּ֤ה הַחִלּ֙וֹתָ֙ לְהַרְא֣וֹת אֶֽת־עַבְדְּךָ֔ אֶ֨ת־גָּדְלְךָ֔ וְאֶת־יָדְךָ֖ הַחֲזָקָ֑ה אֲשֶׁ֤ר מִי־אֵל֙ בַּשָּׁמַ֣יִם וּבָאָ֔רֶץ אֲשֶׁר־יַעֲשֶׂ֥ה כְמַעֲשֶׂ֖יךָ וְכִגְבוּרֹתֶֽךָ׃ אֶעְבְּרָה־נָּ֗א וְאֶרְאֶה֙ אֶת־הָאָ֣רֶץ הַטּוֹבָ֔ה אֲשֶׁ֖ר בְּעֵ֣בֶר הַיַּרְדֵּ֑ן הָהָ֥ר הַטּ֛וֹב הַזֶּ֖ה וְהַלְּבָנֹֽן׃ וַיִּתְעַבֵּ֨ר יהו׳׳ה בִּי֙ לְמַ֣עַנְכֶ֔ם וְלֹ֥א שָׁמַ֖ע אֵלָ֑י וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יהו׳׳ה אֵלַי֙ רַב־לָ֔ךְ אַל־תּ֗וֹסֶף דַּבֵּ֥ר אֵלַ֛י ע֖וֹד בַּדָּבָ֥ר הַזֶּֽה׃ עֲלֵ֣ה ׀ רֹ֣אשׁ הַפִּסְגָּ֗ה וְשָׂ֥א עֵינֶ֛יךָ יָ֧מָּה וְצָפֹ֛נָה וְתֵימָ֥נָה וּמִזְרָ֖חָה וּרְאֵ֣ה בְעֵינֶ֑יךָ כִּי־לֹ֥א תַעֲבֹ֖ר...׃ | I pleaded with YHVH at that time, saying, “My Lord YHVH, You who let Your servant see Your greatness and Your mighty hand, You whose powerful deeds no god in heaven or earth can equal! Please let me cross over and see the good Land across the Jordan, that good hill country, and Lebanon.” YHVH yit'aber' me for your sake and did not hear me. YHVH said to me, “Enough! Do not speak to Me of this matter again! Ascend the Pisgah summit. Raise your eyes west, north, south and east. See, for you won't cross.... |
In that understanding, how was Moses being transformed amidst his disappointment? The second thing that stands out is the unusual Hebrew word יִּתְעַבֵּר / yit'aber – what God did to Moses. Many English translations offer that God became cross or angry... but this Hebrew word has another meaning: "impregnate." Yes, you read that right. In response to Moses' great disappointment, God impregnated him.
What an image: a pregnant Moses! – probably not carrying a fetus, but rather incubating something new – new life, new understanding, new energy, new resilience, new strength.
With this pregnant image, we can re-tell the story: Moses received profoundly disappointing news. First he went quiet: he didn't lash out or blame. Then he pleaded. In time, he filled with a new understanding and resilience. The answer was still "no," but Moses was able to rise high and see in all directions – really get it. He was gifted with vision and comfort, and the strength to carry on with newfound blessing.
So may it be for us all. There's plenty of disappointment to go around. Some ask concerted and urgent action; others ask redirection. May all of us open to incubating new wisdom, new energy, new resilience and new strength – and by that merit lean into this unfolding Season of Meaning to renew our lives and our world.
RSS Feed